Last night, Dave and I were watching the last half of Lost on Tivo. The first half was not recorded, as the designated tivo-setter had been out of the house and the pinch-hitter had been too anxious to get back to a game of Pac Man that he hadn’t adequately scanned the viewing choices. So if anyone wants to tell me what happened during the first half, that would be nice.
ANYWAY….
So we’re sitting there, trying to figure out exactly what happened, but still watching instead of just waiting to watch it online (you’re thinking…just spit it out! get on with it! who cares about Lost! well, I do…) when suddenly a blurry-eyed, dizzy with sleep, mop-haired adorable two year-old wanders out, confused, and asks for a drink of water. Usually, such behavior is discouraged. But this was just so cute.
So I give him some water, smell his sweet head, kiss his neck, and put him back in bed. A few minutes later, he cries for a book. I know in his sleepy state, he doesn’t really need it, but I decide to get a little more snuggle time with the little dude and go in and sing him a song. I sing, he relaxs, I leave. A few minutes later, he cries again. I decide he’s just too scrumptious to leave him alone in there, crying in the dark, so I decide to go in and lay with him until he calms down. I walk in and he’s sitting up, confused, facing the back wall of his room. I come up behind him, curl myself around him, and lay down next to him.
And his bed is wet. Then and only then do I realize there is a sweet, sour smell permeating the air. And now, me. I turn on the light, and my horrible suspicion is confirmed. Vomit. Large amounts of it. And I laid right in it. Oh. GROSS. Gross gross gross gross gross.
Dave must have heard my surprised cry and came to the room. And immediately left. The man can’t come within 30 feet of vomit or he begins to gag. Or so he tells me. And has told me since our first incident with shared vomit responsiblity. So once again, I’m covered in vomit AND cleaning it up by myself. The injustice! His only suggestion… Are you just putting the sheets in the washer like that, full of chunks?! Um. Yes. Unless you want to pick out the chunks first, this is the best I can do. I’d rather pick washed chunks out of the machine later, if needs be. (Too much information yet?) Oh, the vomit I’ve dealt with in the past ten years. I have a really hilarious story that I could tell. But I think I should wait a while. I don’t want to overwhelm you (as if I haven’t already).
The moral of the story? Look before you leap…
11 Comments
Oh Shannon! I am so sorry! There is nothing (and I mean nothing) worse than having a shirt full of vomit. Especially when it’s not expected. Oh, I am feeling for you…
I think when we have kids, this is the fine print at the bottom of the contract that no one tells you about. The other “unknown info” is when a child is potty training… now that’s fun.
Wish I was there to help! And I hope your son is feeling better.
Oh and I don’t have a clue about Lost, otherwise I would anty up.
Hope your day is great!
Ewwwwwww……
talk about lost!
I hate laughing at your pain, but that was just too funny! Trevor was cracking up at Dave’s weakness for vomit. That’s good times there! Trevor would have totally second guessed my putting the sheets in the washer with chunks! Men.
oh Shannon! I feel your pain - although i didn’t crawl in bed with it. But two nights ago Maegan threw up in the middle of the night all over her new comforter - it was 1am….I’m 9 months pregnant and you better believe I tossed the whole thing in the washer - chunks and all. i wasn’t about to get closer than needed to it. lol
Sorry that you have to do the vomit duty by yourself - that sucks. Maybe you could pick Dave up a mask. lol
EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!
(great story though!)
ohhhh yeah, barf, there’s just sometin about it and i too have had my share of grossness over eight years of motherhood…let’s just say that i have been covered from head to toe. oh yea and the mouth and i’m not talking about spit-up.
there are just some things before motherhood that we never even consider happening to us and i’d have to say vomit is one of them.
sorry you have no help with clean up. i don’t really either but he will hold the kid while i do.
hope nobody else got sick and i have to say i have never smelled SWEET barf. YUCK!!!!!!!!
this sooooooo happened to me about a week ago.
went to move jude over to put bing in bed…only to discover jude had thrown up massive amounts of little einstein cereal and nestle nesquik.
GAH-ROSS.
and what you husband asked is hilarious.
wouldn’t have been at the time…but never the less…
funny.
and unjust.
xo,
ash
dude
i almost threw up just READING this
kellicrowe
This is too much! I was laughing out loud at my desk at work, people were looking at me! I only laugh so hard because I have done this very thing! And yes, the sheet go in with the chunks!! LOL…you have made my day. Thank you!
I’d also totally rather pick out washed chunks than unwashed chunks! HUGS
oh that is super GROSS! and love how the hubby just walks out! and i would have done the same thing…chunks in washer and dealt with afterwards.