Spirituality. I can’t get away from it. It seems to be everywhere I turn. And here it is again, in the 12 steps, and in Brene Brown’s research… it looks like it’s not just the Mormons I grew up with who think God is pretty important and that you need a spiritual anchor in your...
Category Archives: personal
March 23, 2012 - 9:37 am
You, my dear, are a very strong person. I don’t think you even know it. <3
March 23, 2012 - 9:45 am
Shannon, I have been reading your posts the last little while and could no longer remain silent. Such moving and powerful words. Your analogies are wonderful and your strength and peace expressed beautifully. Truly, more than this little comment will ever be able to express!
March 23, 2012 - 10:26 am
I’m on that edge between crying and all-out sobbing (pull yourself together, Mindy!). These last few posts have been so beautiful, and have resonated with my own personal experiences on many levels. Can I print these posts out and attach them into my journal, next to those other entries we talked about the other day …or maybe in PLACE of my own entries 
? Seriously, I plan to re-read these words often, and I will forever be grateful for your honest and thoughtful insights. And I thought I couldn’t love you more!
March 23, 2012 - 11:04 am
You did it again. Hit the nail right on the head. Thank you for sharing.
March 23, 2012 - 11:50 am
It is so important to me to comment on these posts, but I don’t even know how to express my thoughts. I’ll stick with thank you, thank you, thank you. Even though that isn’t enough. But it is what I have right now.
March 23, 2012 - 2:50 pm
This post. This…..is kind of leaving me speechless.
While I have certainly related to so many of the things you have already said, this one is sort of a sucker punch to the face for me.
March 23, 2012 - 4:49 pm
ETA–It’s a punch that took my breath away. Not only did you take words out of my mouth, you reached in and shone a light on some of my weakest, most vulnerable thoughts. It’s good though. I needed to hear this.
March 23, 2012 - 6:19 pm
Thanks so much for sharing all this Shannon. I totally related to so much of what you have written. You are wonderful!
March 23, 2012 - 7:19 pm
Shannon, thanks for sharing, (and you’re such a good writer–definitely an I CAN). I love this line: “True religion, true faith, doesn’t create hate (even self-hate).” Isn’t life better when we don’t hate each other or ourselves for failures OR successes?
March 23, 2012 - 7:23 pm
I love the “realness” of this. So refreshing. Thanks Shannon.
March 25, 2012 - 12:36 pm
this was perfect!!!!
March 25, 2012 - 1:30 pm
I want my husband to read “I Can’t” then maybe he’d understand better what’s going on in my head that paralyzes me so much of the time. I see it happening in my daughter too. Both these posts were perfect for today and I thank my sister Stacy for pointing my in your direction. <3
April 19, 2012 - 2:58 pm
hi shannon, i am a friend of your sisters and have been following your blog for a long time. thank you so much for sharing all of these things with us. i have been going through my own version of hell and your words have really encouraged me, part of which was to realize i am not alone in my struggles. thank you again, and please give andrea and family a hug from me next time you see them! (p.s. i LOVE your photography, and am hopeful i can hire you to take pictures of my family someday, especially if we are able to adopt again.)
April 30, 2012 - 8:07 am
Amen!
note: I am so sorry for the length and weight of this. I know I need to share, but I’ve been sitting on this post, afraid to actually publish. However, several conversations with people make me think it might be valuable to others, so I’m going to put it out there. I’ve been on quite...
by shannon
6 comments
March 21, 2012 - 6:26 pm
Absolute wow. I wish I had a way to express how this made me feel. I don’t. Your writing is amazing, your thoughts are life changing, your bravery is incredible and this is just plain good stuff. Really good stuff. Thank you for taking the time to share and be real about it. I wish there was a way for everyone to read this post. Whether they have felt a small or large part of what you went through or not, everyone needs this. They just do. I’m so grateful I read it. Thanks Shannon.
March 21, 2012 - 9:25 pm
I think you are the bomb. Just sayin.
I love seeing all these thoughts written down. I agree with Linn–it’s really good stuff. Keep at it.
March 21, 2012 - 9:50 pm
love, this was beautiful!!!! i am so sorry for all of this…so sorry!!! i KNOW the heaviness and the sadness. i also am VERY aware of the ADD. i have never been diagnosed but after reserch for myself and my oldest son i have been able to really pinpoint what is really wrong with us. i have been luky enough to be able to really train and redirect myself so that i can be present in my own life and REALLY be a part of conversations with other people and get the heck out of my own head. as far as my boy is concerned he’s almost 13 and because he is not a problem at home we have chosen not to medicate just so that he can get good grades. i totally know that everyone has their own opinions on this but while i realize that school is very important i want my boy to be MY boy and not a shell of him (he’s just too much fun! ) i hope that you can get this all worked out. i just love you and i love the realness of all of this. you are far from alone and i can see that healing is on it’s way. you are going to be so much wiser and such an amazing and understanding friend and wife and leader.
March 21, 2012 - 11:09 pm
I am right there with you. I have had the exact same thoughts. I can’t is pretty powerful. But luckily I can is too. It looks like you are on the right path…a hard, long, sometimes painful path, but right & good nonetheless. Keep writing, it inspires me.
March 22, 2012 - 8:38 am
This brought tears to my eyes. Tears for you, my dear and talented friend, struggling, and me… not being there for you. Tears for me because I have felt and said and stressed about those same exact things. And tears, because you have such a way with words. A definite talent and blessing. I want to share a quote that I randomly saved on my desktop while preparing a talk recently. I came across it yesterday after a particularly bad day of feeling inadequate and judged and beat down.
It’s from Pres. Uchtdorf
“God wants to help us to eventually turn all of our weaknesses into strengths, but He knows that this is a long-term goal. He wants us to become perfect, and if we stay on the path of discipleship, one day we will. It’s OK that you’re not quite there yet. Keep working on it, but stop punishing yourself.”
I immediately printed it out and hung it on my cupboard.
March 22, 2012 - 10:35 am
If I could squeeze into the ol’ cheerleading skirt (go ahead, picture it and laugh your head off) and do a little cheer for you I would! Love, love, LOVE this post!!! We all need to stop beating ourselves up for not being perfect. Nobody CAN do it all and if they say they CAN they’re liars. You know that Trevor and I have been dealing with the ADD thing for almost 4 years now. Preston we do medicate and although Trevor got a prescription as well, we never filled it. It was surreal sitting through all those parent meetings when they were describing it. Trevor and kept giving each other covert glances. They weren’t describing Preston; it was Trevor all over the place! And you’re right, it was a relief to figure out the problem but it brought with it a whole bucket full of new ones. I’ve never had the courage to write about it, or about Carson’s aspergers. You are so brave and I hope you know how much it means to know there’s someone who understands. I know everyone keeps saying this, but you really have such a beautiful way of expressing yourself. Thank you! You’re flippin’ amazing.
Oh boy. TWO teenagers in the house. This is crazy. Matthew turn 13 today! Here is a picture of him that I took yesterday. Right? That was yesterday, right? I mean, I’m pretty sure it was. Freak. I can’t believe how much he’s changed. He is one cool kid. As much as I loved that...
by shannon
3 comments
March 15, 2012 - 9:43 pm
Why do we not live closer? I need to start my boy’s 13 year old post now. What a cute, cool kid! He looks so much like you, it’s adorable! Don’t tell him I called him that. Happy Birthday Matthew!
March 16, 2012 - 3:35 pm
I still feel guilty about those hives! Happy Birthday Matt!
March 17, 2012 - 10:28 pm
Aw! I remember babysitting that little spikey-haired Matt! He and Shelby wanted only egg-white eggs for some reason. That was fun! Happy birthday Matt!
When I talked about this blog being a place where I celebrate the good things in my life, there is nothing better than these guys. (well, Dave too… but he’s not in the shots here) I captured these images nearly a year ago. In the meantime, Matthew has grown a bunch and gotten braces. Franklin...
by shannon
7 comments
March 12, 2012 - 2:46 pm
Yes I totally agree, God does care about good photography. We had just such a moment as you described a year ago Christmastime.
Again, I love your writing. I can always totally relate to it. It has always been so. Take care friend.
March 12, 2012 - 3:00 pm
You put it soooo perfectly- about why pictures are important to us. (Except women more than men, I think.) But yes, it does make you feel a surge of love in your heart when you see your children peaceful and happy, even when you know that chaos was actually happening in the milliseconds before and after. And also how it does save, in a small, precious way, who they were then, and looking back later you just can’t believe how much they’ve changed.
And your photos are gorgeous. And your children are too. And your words.
March 12, 2012 - 6:08 pm
Such treasures! your children, your pictures, your words!!! Wow Shannon!!!
March 13, 2012 - 9:39 am
I’m laughing so hard right now. It was a beautiful post and you can always say what I’m feeling (get out of my head). But I am soooo that yelling mom when we’re getting family pictures done! But in my defense, my kids are the only kids on the planet who don’t cooperate during picture time. It’s really not my fault.
March 19, 2012 - 9:28 pm
Love the silouhette pic!
March 19, 2012 - 9:28 pm
Love%20the%20silouhette%20pic!
March 20, 2012 - 2:01 am
loved this post. and um. can you tell your kiddos to stop growing up? Seriously, almost didn’t recognize your oldest!! beautiful kids you have there….there definitely needs to be lots of picture taking (I saw this so I can convince myself to take more pics of my own kids!)
I decided to be all wholehearted and stuff. For real. But it turns out, it’s pretty hard. There’s a reason people choose to numb, however they choose to numb. Ben and Jerry, thank you. Don’t worry, I’m doing ok. I just find paying attention all the time and not zoning out or hiding from things...
by shannon
2 comments
March 8, 2012 - 8:29 am
It’s hard to be awesomer than last year because you are already so awesome!!! And it sounds like it might be time for a Field Trip Friday!!!
March 8, 2012 - 2:24 pm
I think being wholehearted should include plenty of B&J’s. It’s all about being true to yourself, right? Don’t be ashamed of your relationship with Ben OR Jerry! I’ve found them to be good listeners, soothing to the soul, and slightly crunchy. All good things.
by shannon
14 comments